passive aggressive

Do you avoid confrontation as a way of being “nice”? Do you hint at what you prefer to your partner or act withdrawn when you’re angry, rather than expressing yourself directly? If you are nodding your head yes then you, my friend, are expressing yourself passive-aggressively and this kind of behavior can sabotage your relationships without you even knowing it.

The truth is, being passive-aggressive helps no one. When you are the one basically speaking in code with indirect actions and language, your partner doesn’t get the chance to authentically understand your desires and who you really are. This makes it virtually impossible for them to be a part of the solution for you. And if you never confront this behavioral pattern, it can infect all your relationships, not just romantic ones, by being acted out at work, school or in any relationship.

In this Real Love Revolution video, Part 2 of Stop Being Passive Aggressive Series, I cover:

  • What passive-aggressive behavior looks like
  • The effects of being passive-aggressive
  • Why this behavior strips you of intimacy in relationships
  • How to liberate yourself from being passive-aggressive

One of the many negative consequences of passive-aggressive behavior includes prolonging a problem. By refusing to tackle something head-on, and trying to avoid conflict, you are fueling the continuation of the conflict. And this creates pain for YOU plus everyone else.

Another consequence of this behavior is that you are almost guaranteeing that your needs won’t be met in any relationship. This is because you’re not letting anyone know how you really feel or what you really want. But I promise you, speaking directly and honestly is a skill that you can learn if you’re motivated.

To truly understand how this might be affecting your life and relationships,
download the full Effects of Passive Aggressive Behavior Checklist here.

Get honest with yourself! If you find this is one of the many ways you’re communicating right now, you can unlearn this behavior and liberate yourself. (I’ll guide you!)

Drop me a comment here on the blog and let me know what resonated with you after watching this video. Then head over to my YouTube Channel and SUBSCRIBE for free access to every Real Love Revolution vid! Join the conversation with #RealLoveRevolution on social media and share the love!

Thanks for watching, reading, and sharing!

And as always, take care of YOU! OWNLOAD NO

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  1. Hi, I greatly appreciate your talent in helping me acknowledge my passive aggressive behavior. Can I please be emailed the Passive Aggressive checklist? Thank you in advance.

  2. Hello, Terri! Thank you a lot for sharing this valuable information! I am 22 years old and currently in my first relationship, but I noticed that even though I feel it is perfect I tend to feel miserable everytime I have passive aggressive moments. I used to call it being non-confrontational, but your video helped me call this behavior by its real name. I would like to use the checklist for further self-study, could anyone from your team email it to me as well?

    1. I’m glad to hear the video resonated with you. You can absolutely access the checklist by clicking on the download now button, and when you enter the information you will be able to download it for yourself! Sending you light and strength.

  3. My mind is blown. I have been burning bridges and relationships for years with no understanding why. Its a strange feeling to know that this behavior is not normal but no idea about how to define it or stop it. I have been to counselor after counselor and not one time have I been told about passive aggressive behavior. I try to talk to my family about your explanation and it is not well received. Just like you said families try and I love them but I watched my parents treat each other like this for years. I don’t practice but I grew up catholic and we would be sitting in the car waiting for dad just like you explained waiting for your husband. Whew!! I could keep going but I think I will stop there. Truly an eye opener for me. I feel like I can finally come to terms with my anger and work towards a new and improved me. Powerful. Ty ty ty

    1. Thank you for taking the time to share your insights here with us, Mark. It warms my heart to know that you are moving along on your healing journey at a quicker rate now. Keep up the great work.

    1. Hi I’m also looking for the checklist after watching your videos I realize I display this behavior and want to change it I’m still a little unclear as to where to start can you clarify for me?

      1. Hi Krysta, the checklist is at the bottom of the article. If you click on Download Now you can enter in your name and email and get instant access. Hope this helps! I’m cheering you on!!

  4. Wonderful wonderful episode. I thing I am unclear on is to to deal with someone who is passive aggressivly stone walling you – ignoring you, pouting and it’s your co-worker. This hurts me so bad but I don’t know how to resolve it because I don’t think she’ll be able to acknowledge her behavior, and as you said. I find myself getting enraged that she is treating me like this. Any tips?

    1. Liz,
      Thanks for your question and for watching! I’m sorry you are dealing with office drama. First try not to take the behavior personally, someone who acts this way is fearful and anxious. Breathe deep and choose your battles strategically. Wait until the situation has cooled off before trying to discuss anything with this person. If it doesn’t get better, perhaps contact your human resources department. I hope it works out and am so glad you’re here! xo

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