Have you ever been going about your day, minding your own business, when suddenly your heart starts to race? Your thoughts begin spinning faster and faster, your chest tightens, and you feel certain that something terrible is about to happen, even though nothing has actually changed.

Welcome to anxiety.

It can show up suddenly and powerfully, convincing you that you are in danger when you are not. Anxiety can make us spiral, feeding on itself until we feel trapped in panic. But the good news is, you have far more control than you think.

In this week’s episode of The Terri Cole Show, I am breaking down what actually happens during an anxiety spiral, how to recognize it early, and what you can do to calm your body and mind before it takes over.

Prefer the audio? Listen here.

What’s Really Happening When Anxiety Hits

Anxiety is not just “being worried.” It is a physical and neurological response. Your nervous system is essentially slamming an alarm bell, flooding your body with stress hormones, and preparing you for danger even when no real threat exists.

According to the CDC’s National Health Statistics Report from November 2024, one in five adults in the United States experiences anxiety symptoms.

So if you struggle with anxious thoughts or racing sensations, you are definitely not alone.

Therapeutically, we talk about something called anticipatory anxiety. This is when the fear of having another anxiety episode becomes its own trigger. The body begins to tense up, breathing becomes shallow, the heart speeds up, and your mind takes that physical discomfort as proof that something is wrong, which makes you even more anxious. It becomes a feedback loop between your body and your thoughts.

Once you understand that anxiety is both physical and psychological, you can begin to interrupt that loop.

Recognize the Early Warning Signs

Learning to spot the early symptoms is one of the most effective ways to stop anxiety from snowballing.

Some of the first signs include:

• Shallow or rapid breathing
• Shoulders creeping up to your ears
• Racing heart or tightness in the chest
• Restlessness and an inability to sit still
• Stomach tension or fluttering sensations

For some people, anxiety feels like their heartbeat moves into their face or ears. For others, it feels like their entire body becomes their heartbeat.

Catching these early signals matters because they are invitations to pause and ground yourself before full-blown panic arrives. The earlier you intervene, the faster you can reset your system.

What Doesn’t Work (and Why)

When anxiety starts to build, many of us reach for habits that seem logical but actually make things worse.

You cannot think your way out of anxiety. The clever inner voice that says, “Just calm down” or “Don’t think about it,” usually adds more pressure. Trying to fight the feeling only feeds it.

Avoiding every person, place, or situation that might trigger anxiety is not the answer either. Avoidance may feel protective, but it reinforces the idea that you cannot handle discomfort, and your world begins to shrink.

And if you’ve ever had someone tell you to “just relax,” you know that does not work because if it did, no one would have anxiety.

The truth is, anxiety is not about logic. It is a nervous system response, not a character flaw. The way out is through calming your body first so that your mind can follow.

What Actually Helps in the Moment

The most effective tools for calming anxiety are simple, physical, and accessible anywhere.

1. Slow down your breathing.
   Focus on making your exhale longer than your inhale. This simple action activates the parasympathetic nervous system, which signals safety to your body.
2. Move your body gently.
   Stretch, walk, shake out your hands, or roll your shoulders. If you can, go outside and ground yourself in nature. I often slip off my shoes and stand with my bare feet in the grass. It sounds simple, but it truly helps me feel centered again.
3. Name what you are feeling.
   Therapists sometimes say, “Name it to tame it.” Describe what is happening without judgment: “My face feels hot. My chest feels tight. My thoughts are racing.” Stating facts instead of telling a story interrupts the spiral.
4. Engage your senses.
   Put your hands in cold water, light a candle, listen to music, or smell something pleasant. You can also call or text a friend. Even small sensory actions bring you back to the present moment, where anxiety has less power.
5. Remind yourself this feeling is temporary.
   It might feel endless, but anxiety always passes. I used to run drug treatment groups, and one of my clients who was recovering from addiction told me he used to stop wherever he was, look at his watch, and count to 30 seconds whenever he had an urge to use. That simple pause created enough space to let the moment move through him. The same idea works here. Stop, breathe, and let the wave pass.

Practice Self-Compassion and Ask for Support

Anxiety can bring even the strongest people to their knees. For high-functioning, type A, or perfectionistic personalities, that loss of control can feel especially hard.

I do not experience anxiety very often, but when I do, I really dislike it. My old impulse was to handle it alone, to power through. But over time, I learned that allowing others to support me is part of healing. Letting my husband, Vic, my sisters, or my team step in when I am struggling is not weakness. It is self-awareness.

If a friend or a child you loved were anxious, you would not criticize them. You would comfort them. That same gentleness is what you deserve. Speak to yourself kindly. Allow yourself to rest, ask for help, or take a break. Compassion calms the nervous system faster than self-criticism ever could.

Building an Anxiety-Resilient Life

The more you proactively care for your body and mind, the less likely anxiety is to build up and spill over. Think of these habits as daily emotional hygiene.

Move your body regularly.
Even 10 minutes of movement a day can discharge nervous energy.

Maintain consistent sleep.
Lack of sleep is one of the most common anxiety triggers.

Limit caffeine.
Many people, especially women in perimenopause and menopause, notice that caffeine now increases edginess instead of focus—experiment with reducing or cutting it off by midday.

Practice mindfulness.
A few minutes of guided meditation, deep breathing, or journaling each day can create lasting calm.

These are simple, but they work. When you commit to them, your baseline stress lowers, which means anxiety has less room to grow.

Anxiety vs. Depression: Knowing the Difference

People often ask me how to tell the difference between anxiety and depression. Here is a simple way to think about it.

• Anxiety speeds everything up. Your body, your thoughts, your heart rate.
• Depression slows everything down. Your motivation, your movement, your outlook.
• Anxiety whispers, “Something bad will happen.”
• Depression says, “Nothing good will happen.”

Anxiety makes you want to escape. Depression makes you want to hide. Both are treatable, and both respond well to mindfulness, therapy, and consistent self-care.

When to Seek Help

If anxiety or depression begins interfering with your daily life, if you cannot work, sleep, or connect with others, it is time to get professional support. Therapy, medication, and evidence-based treatments are available, and there is no shame in reaching for them.

In the free guide that goes with this episode, I have included a list of trusted resources and hotlines if you need help finding the right kind of care.

Final Thoughts

Anxiety is a liar. It tells you that you are in danger when you are safe, that you cannot handle what is coming when you absolutely can, and that you are alone when you are not.

The goal is not to eliminate anxiety completely. It is to remember that you have tools, awareness, and resilience on your side. You have survived 100 percent of your most anxious moments, and you will survive the next one, too.

I encourage you to download the guide so you have these strategies handy whenever you need them.

And if this post resonated with you, share it with someone who might need to hear that they are stronger than their most anxious moment.

As always, take care of you.

FAQ

1. What is an anxiety spiral?
   An anxiety spiral happens when anxious thoughts trigger physical sensations like a racing heart or tight chest, which your brain interprets as danger. The cycle repeats, feeding itself until it becomes panic.
2. Can you really stop anxiety once it starts?
   Yes. Grounding techniques like slow breathing, naming what you feel, and gentle movement can interrupt the anxiety feedback loop and calm your nervous system.
3. What are the early warning signs of anxiety?
   Early signs include shallow breathing, tightness in the chest, restlessness, racing thoughts, and muscle tension. Recognizing these cues early helps you intervene before panic sets in.
4. When should I seek professional help for anxiety?
   If anxiety interferes with your work, relationships, or ability to rest, it is time to talk to a therapist. Anxiety disorders are highly treatable with therapy, mindfulness, and, when needed, medication.