Are you the all or nothing type? Go big or go home? I’m a reformed all or nothing type of gal. For example, one year I made a New Year’s resolution to get in shape, so I registered for the New York City Marathon. Did I actually run the race? No. I was so overwhelmed at the thought of winding around New York City streets for 26.2 miles as a novice runner that I never even tried. I also figured, not only do I not know where to start, it’s not like I’ll win, so why bother?
Rather than experiencing the journey, I was so focused on the grandiose destination that I cut myself off before I even started. Much better would have been for me to start walking to work and build myself up from there. (I will say that a couple years later, once I lost the all or nothing trip, I trained for and completed a mini triathlon! Whooo Hoooo! Go me! And, yes, a training plan was essential.)
This week, I challenge you to think about three situations in your life that you keep saying you are going to do but get so bogged down with the result rather than the steps leading to that result that you haven’t even started. Commit to taking one small step in each situation. You will see you achieve the ultimate goal much faster! You have broken a big plate into manageable bite sizes.
Seeing the end result can be motivating – what a thrill to cross the finish line – but it can also be frustrating if you don’t put a plan in place. When you become too future-focused, your mind can trip you up. You start to create self-doubt – “you’ve never run more than 3 miles, what makes you think you can run 9 times that distance?” Only thinking about 26.2 miles is a lot to chew! However, if you commit to a training program that breaks the mileage down into week-by-week goals, you become more focused on the present and every week have a chance to assess just how much progress you’ve made. Maybe you will run that marathon or maybe you’ll realize that you are not a fan of running, but you discovered another form of exercise that you love and gets your booty movin’. You’ll never know until you get off the couch!
I use the getting in shape example, which I think is very common, but this same mind game parlays into other aspects of our lives as well. Have you ever wanted to change jobs, but the thought of resumes, cover letters, interviews, and learning new people and skills at a new workplace got so cumbersome that you just decided to stay in your same ol’ job? Even if it meant you would be unhappy? Instead, one week update your resume. The next week, set aside a Saturday or Sunday afternoon to do an internet search of places you like, interests you have, causes close to your heart, and see of there are openings at businesses that resonate with you. Many employers now have an online application, so you can apply right then. The next week, follow up with the places you sent your resume. See what transpires. Maybe you’ll land the job of your dreams or maybe you’ll discover a whole new job that you never even knew existed but peaks your interest. It might happen next week or maybe not for a couple months, but rest assured, it will NEVER happen if you never send a resume!
Small steps are one step closer to your goal. If you can stay focused on your next right action, you will get you to the finish line in your right and perfect time.
So, can you do the challenge? Are you going to do it? Share your three “I’ll get around to it someday” scenarios and the small step you are committed to take this week in each of the three.
Love Love Love
Terri
Just found you through the tapping summit 2012. love this…errrr…oh…tune up tip (had to scroll up to find that). I’m doin it! I just had an inutitive thought that the screenplay that I am overwhelmed at the thought of actually trying to write. The ‘be kind to yourself’ thingy you stressed the red room at the summit coupled with this has made me decide to just write one scene…any scene this week. I’m ditching the “I MUST WRITE 4 HOURS A DAY OR I WON’T EVER GET THERE AND OF COURSE I CAN’T DO THIS BECAUSE I’M A BIG FAT LOSER!!!” position I’ve worked so hard to cultivate. Think I’m gonna work out once or twice too. And maybe I’ll even do a load of laundry. Busy week…hehehe…that’s kind of a scary truth…but it’s my truth and i think i read something somewhere about living it. Look forward to your weekly…errr…right…tune up tip. thanks.
haha gregory-
you made me laugh and I feel you trust me!
so glad to be ‘found’ 😉
Haha – that all or nothing thinking is SO ME. That kind of thinking has held me back for years and years, and here I am now, at age 42 still being held back. Here are my three biggest goals right now:
1. Graduate from College with a degree in education – I want to be a middle school or high school art teacher. 2. Run a half marathon – my husband is an “ultra runner” – he runs 24 hour races, generally 100 miles or so. I know better than to try and keep up with him – but I know I can accomplish this goal if I really put some effort into it. 3. Overcome my fear of water – that’s a doozie.
Things I will do this week: Make appointment with counselor at the school I am planning on attending, create a plan for graduation. Start walking/jogging at least 4 times a week. I don’t even know what to do about the water thing – it seems to have just gotten worse as I’ve gotten older. It’s the worst thing in my life that holds me back honestly. 🙁 Blegh.
This is (or was) so like me too, though I sometimes find it tricky as the big juicy goal (such as the marathon example you gave) can be huge motivation – at least at the beginning. ‘I will start walking to work’ (as an alpha-type) would seem less enthralling – however it is so true that these juicy goals can be so big that we don’t even get started.
As I’ve got older I’ve realised it can be important to take a breath and step back to think about goal-setting; I wanted to run a marathon too for the sense of accomplishment and the joy of crossing a finish line to lots of fanfare, but actually for me the time spent between the 10mile and 26mile section would likely be arduous, repetitive, painful and gruelling. I remember reading an interview with Usain Bolt who said he’s never run a marathon, because he’s a sprinter! So it’s important to play to your natural abilities and what you enjoy, rather than just going for the glory.
Sarah~
Yes to totally taking the step back and really thinking about what experience you want to create not just the parade we want someone to throw us LOL
love love love
terri
My three “I’ll get around to it someday” are: 1. getting healthy – which involves eating right and working out 2. Finding out my passion (I always say I don’t know what to do with my life, without spending the time and investment to discovery possible avenues) 3.House improvements, especially the backyard!
The small steps I’ll take for each are: 1. Review calendar and schedule times to workout, ask a friend to go with 2. Being the process by spending an hour a day reviewing my interests and industries that align with each other 3. Call a trash bin service to review costs to start the clean up process for the backyard.
Holly~
Go YOU! We are totally happy to witness your list and we will be here when you circle back and tell us all about how your feel after taking these small steps that will equal big fat positive change!!
love love love
terri