Are you a complainer? Be honest.

Do you like being around complainers? Of course not!

The act of complaining is more than simply saying something negative. Whether you realize it or not, this negativity impacts your life. When you complain, you are focusing on what is wrong as opposed to what is right. Since we are all made up of energy, our thoughts, feelings, and words carry energy as well. The negative vibration that stems from complaining goes out into the universe, grabs other negative things, and brings them into your life in the form of unfulfilling relationships, careers, etc. If you don’t believe me, the next time you’re in a bad mood and can’t shake it, see how your day unfolds. With ease and grace? Or a crappy series of mishaps like a domino effect?

Just a couple weeks ago, I was stressed and frustrated. Because it was all I focused on and had myself in a constricted mess, I locked myself out of my apartment, in the freezing cold, not-properly dressed. When I got back inside (thank you neighbor for being home and AWAKE at the early hour) and changed, I left AGAIN for work. Late and frantic, I slipped and fell right in the middle of a NYC street and then proceeded to lose my phone and mess up my clients’ appointment times. Instead of losing my mind, I stopped, regrouped, and recalibrated. I chose to focus on what was right in my life, and then, viola, the day flowed swimmingly! (Although my bloody knee and bruised ego were painful reminders to BE HERE NOW!)

So, I have a challenge for you.

It requires you to be very aware and mindful IN THE PRESENT MOMENT. Take one day—a solid 24 hours—and every time you start to complain, catch yourself, and stop. Try to stop BEFORE you complain. How often do you want to complain and say something negative? Write down when you want to complain and what you want to complain about. It’s probably more often than you think, and much of the time about things that don’t really matter. Know that bringing awareness to the habit is the first step to overcoming it and replacing it with a more positive one.

Let me know how the challenge goes for you. What did you learn? Maybe you can dig deeper and get to the root of why you complain and the dissatisfaction you feel.

Your emotional wellbeing and relationships are worth the time and effort to overcome the chronic complainer syndrome! You don’t like being around a complainer, and neither does anyone else. Be the positivity you want to draw to you.

I hope you have an amazing week, focusing on what’s right, and, as always, take care of you.

Love Love Love


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  1. Terri, I have been trying to be more mindful of my own complaining over the past few months and it has made a difference. There are those times, however, when I get sucked down into a pity party – I am just able to get out of that funk that much more easily. One additional thing I have been working on is helping others to get out of their complaining rut – it takes some tact, but since at the core of a complaint is the acknowledgement that there is something amiss that we are choosing not to tend to, sometimes it just takes a simple “well, let’s work together to see what we can do to tend to [the complaint]”

    1. Jakers19-
      thanks for sharing here with us! I love the subtle way you have come up with to help those in your life get from being stuck in the problem to trying to move to solution mode with support 😉

  2. I totally believe in the power of our words.
    I have been diagnosed with metastasized breast
    cancer. Everyone asks how my treatments are
    going. How do I keep my answer positive even
    though the answer is not good? I do not like
    giving any energy to the cancer by always having
    to give people updates.

    1. Sherry-
      Dr Wayne Dyer talks quite a bit about his leukemia diagnosis and he always affirms, I AM WELL. You don’t owe anyone an update -even if their heart is in the right place. Be honest and say, I am keeping it all positive because that is what empowers me. Only share your deepest feelings with a few trusted inner circle pals. Have you read any of Kris Carr’s stuff?
      If not find her and get reading her first book Crazy Sexy Cancer Tips deals with all of these questions and has ton of resources as well. I am sending you healing energy right this very minute. xo

  3. Your No-Complaining challenge is like a golden ray of sunshine. So much is worrying me and overwhelming me right now. But also, so much is right in my life. When I concentrate on what I have and what is good, it is all so wonderful.

    Complaining never fixed anything. (Doing and working, however, can fix things 🙂

    Thank you!
    — Bryan

  4. I agree! I live with a couple if chronic complainers and its challenging to be around. I think it’s best to try to make the most of circumstance no matter what and why not keep that chin up and stay as strong as possible. Imagine success, solutions, and create a life you’re proud of. If you find that you haven’t been doing that, then find the strength to start anew and reinvent it!

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