Be honest – do you secretly hate Valentines Day? If you’re single – it can be kind of depressing or make you feel more alone. If you’re in a relationship – it can sometimes be anticlimactic or disappointing even if you and your partner do celebrate it in some way.
This year, single or partnered, why not do something completely different?
Take Care of You
Every year in the Real Love Revolution, we create a Self-Love Valentine’s Day Ritual. If you’re in a relationship and you still want to do something for your significant other, that’s great, do that too…but I want you to focus on the power of SELF-love this year.
When you practice self-love, you put out a certain energy and vibration into the world and that attracts others who have a similar energy or vibration. Having healthy self- esteem means that you can draw healthy boundaries with ease and grace, you can speak authentically, and negotiate for your own needs. If you have low self-esteem and you think you are not worthy of kindness, love or of being cherished, you will inevitably attract people into your life who agree with you. If you are in a relationship and insist on doing everything for yourself and don’t express your desires and preferences, you are basically training your partner to NOT step up for you. It’s tempting to lie to ourselves by brushing disappointments off as “no big deal.” But the reality is that it IS a big deal. Your self-regard is directly impacting who you attract and what behavior you allow in your life.
Your Real Love Revolution Self-Love Valentine’s Day Ritual
Step 1: Journal
Give yourself intimate, alone time to write in your journal and really get in touch with your thoughts. Some questions to get you started:
- What is it that would make you feel loved?
- What currently makes you feel loved?
- What is the kind of love that you want in your life? What does that look like?
- How do you want to feel in your relationship with yourself and with others?
Step 2: Create a Zen Den
Create a little sacred space for yourself, somewhere that you can sit often. Make it comfortable, cozy and part of your self-loving experience. Intentionally create a safe and comforting space just for you. Some ideas of items for your Zen Den:
- Fairy lights
- Candles (be safe!)
- Essential Oils
- A soft, fuzzy blanket or cushion
- Your journal
- Pictures of loved ones
- Flowers, leaves or other natural seasonal items
Step 3: Plan Your Gift to Yourself
Enter your Zen Den space and using the inspiration and discoveries from your journaling exercise, decide what would be a beautiful Valentine’s Day gift to give yourself. It can be the smallest thing or the biggest gesture, but it’s all about you treating yourself with love and consideration. You have the power to make yourself feel good…do something that makes you feel the way you want to feel.
(Some ideas from past include: Having a luxurious bubble bath with candles and champagne, having a manicure and pedicure, buying some jewelry, getting a massage, buying yourself flowers, joining that gym class you’ve always wanted to, going out for dinner with girlfriends, having a day off just to yourself…)
Please share what you decide in the comments, on my social media, or if you are a woman in my amazing group of like-minded and like-hearted lady loves inside the Real Love Revolution private Facebook group. I would LOVE to hear what you come up with. (To join my Real Love Revolution waiting list, get free meditations, quizzes and live Q&A sessions where I will answer your burning questions about love PLUS become a member of our RLR Private Facebook group just click here…it’s FREE!)
You Have the Power
The Real Love Revolution is based on my strong belief that self-love is the only path to all other healthy, fulfilling love. The intention of this ritual is to emphasize that it isn’t about someone else making you feel a particular way…it’s about taking responsibility for making yourself feel loved and supported. By doing this and raising your own vibration and self-regard, you put out energy that attracts similar energy.
It is so important that you get your own relationship to yourself in order before you go out and spend money, time, and energy on trying to find fulfillment with another person. If you don’t figure out that self-loving relationship first, you might continue to attract unsatisfying people and relationships into your life.
You have the power to make yourself feel loved – it’s not something that someone else withholds or bestows on you. When you really discover that truth and learn to love yourself, you start to attract people who agree with that high self-assessment…and you deserve to be truly, deeply loved.