Last week I talked about the dating disaster that is ghosting. But as a psychotherapist, I couldn’t just leave it there! What are the implications of someone who ghosts? How is it easier and better for some people to ghost than to have a mature conversation? So I did some research about how this phenomenon might be connected to someone’s attachment style, and I wanted to share what I found with you.
This episode is about ending things. Are you good at goodbyes? How do you say goodbye? Do you honor endings? I think that this desire to control things and control endings has to do with the fact that we don’t actually want things to end. Today I’m talking about different kinds of attachment and why you might not be good at goodbyes.
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“This ability to be anonymous now – not just private – has really inspired this ability to be really insensitive.” – Terri Cole
- Why endings and change are constant
- What are attachment styles
- How the internet gave rise to ghosting
- Who is ghosting
- What is an avoidant attachment style
“When I did all this research I found that many people who are ghosting are the people who have this avoidant attachment style.” – Terri Cole
- What is the cost of not ending things properly
- How ending things ties into the youth obsessed culture
- Why you should examine the goodbyes in your life
- Why ghosters are robbing themselves of experiences
“It requires a certain amount of emotional strength to handle something head on, to tell the truth.” – Terri Cole
“There really is a cost of not ending things properly and being in denial.” – Terri Cole