When you’re STRESSING  being LATE, you’re not PRESENT @Terri_Cole {CLICK TO TWEET}

Timeliness is an interesting concept and it seems each and every person has their own relationship to it. Some people operate on the belief that if they are not early they are late. (Me!) Others somehow endlessly miscalculate the amount of time it will take to get from point A to point B. This causes stress in relationships and can sabotage promising careers.

I believe that being on time can be a powerful part of the foundation for being successful. Yet I know many of you truly struggle with making it happen. Although I believe punctuality is important, being stressed out about time, whether you are always early or constantly late, is not empowering.

If you sweat time there are small steps that you can take to change your relationship to time

1. Prepare

Take appropriate steps to make sure your gas tank is full, meals are made and lists are written the night before. You may feel resistance at first but muscle through and do it anyway. The more you practice the more of a habit preparation will become.

Chronic lateness is an easy way to SABOTAGE your DREAMS @Terri_Cole {CLICK TO TWEET}

2. Surrender

Certain experiences poke holes in our illusion of being in total control. Unexpected traffic, a twenty four hour flu or last minute schedule changes can happen to anyone. The sooner you learn to surrender to the ebb and flow of unexpected events, the more at ease you will be when they occur. Preparing for the unforeseen by allotting twenty to thirty minutes will also put your mind at ease.  Whether you are always late, or early, there’s not much that freaking out while sitting in a traffic jam will accomplish. Surrendering to the truth of the matter and alerting someone that you got caught up is all you can do. Consciously calming your mind and connecting to your breathe can help keep you in the present moment until you can reach your destination.

3. Show Up

Being chronically late weakens your word. Agreeing to a time and then breaking that agreement repeatedly, does not build trusting relationships. Being chronically early and still worrying about being late is stressful as well, but that behavior is less damaging to your relationships and your career. Taking an honest look at your relationship to time can spare you stress down the road. Most people who are chronically late have what Guy Winch, Ph D refers to as ‘blind spots’ that lead them to miscalculate the time it takes to actually get from point A to point B. You will allot less time if you are calculating the trip based on optimal conditions or if you are forgetting to factor in the time it takes to walk to the subway etc.

Successful people make COMMITMENTS & follow through…PERIOD @Terri_Cole {CLICK TO TWEET}

I am inviting you to get honest about your relationship to time and challenging you to one week of NO LATENESS! Can you do it? I think you can and if you are confused about how much time to allot for anything post a comment below and people who are not chronically late will weigh in (and me too of course!)

You matter.

And I know that you can change your mind about time if you so desire. I am here to help and look forward to hearing from you so keep me posted on your progress and as always, take care of you.

Love Love Love




*image courtesy of Sean

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  1. I used to struggle with chronic lateness. And then I dug deep to uncover the underlying driver to my lateness — fear and anxiety. I hated being early because I would get anxious as I waited for whoever else I was meeting. My mind would go into overdrive as it thought up every possible scenario that could play out. But if I arrived late, then the situation was already unfolding and I could just join in, with far fewer anxiety. Now I say affirmations to myself when I’m going somewhere at a certain time. And oooh yes, surrender! I love that tip – it’s so very useful. I’m happy to say that I’m frequently early or on time!

  2. Wow Terri! I was just thinking about this very subject this weekend. We had a mini family reunion of sorts with a cousin’s anniversary party, my own women’s meeting and my father’s 75th birthday and Pastoral Anniversary, ALL in one weekend. As I picked my sister up from the train station on Friday, I knew we’d be late for the anniversary party. There are things that I could have done to ensure an on time arrival but I didn’t do them. I thought about how now I am becoming the cousin who shows up late for each of my family’s events and how crappy that felt. I arrived later than the cousin KNOWN for being late. UGHHH! I decided that this was the last time that I would not keep an agreement with myself or anyone else to be present and on time for anything. I will do my absolute best to commit that to myself just because I know that I am better than that.

    And yes, I agree, chronic lateness does sabotage your dreams. It causes you to not trust the one you need to trust the most….yourself.

    1. Hi Linda,
      Thank you for sharing. I wonder if this has something to do with an internal block about ‘giving away’ your time for free? It’s interesting that there is such a difference between your time relationship to time when it comes to work and volunteering. I hope these tips help across the board. Circle back and let me know your thoughts on paid vs. free work. All my best- Terri

    1. Hi Toylene, It sounds like you have made a very conscious effort and have come a long way. Good for you! Know that just like with anything success and consistency are never perfect. Children, and their sometimes uncooperative behavior, is something you won’t always have control over. Perhaps consider putting more effort into preparation (tip 1) and showing up (tip 3), so that on days when the kids act up, you’ll at least know that you have done what you can do. Being a single mom is the hardest job in the world, I have a feeling you may need to be easier on yourself and take time to focus each day on the things you did really well. If you run late a couple days, that’s okay, you are doing the best you can. What is most important is that you love your children with all your heart, and that you keep taking care of you! – xo Terri

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