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“This is a core and telltale sign of any narcissistic personality disorder: Narcissists lack the ability to have actual empathy for others. It’s extremely painful to be in any relationship with someone who cannot have compassion for you.”
– Terri Cole

 

Intro

When you think about a narcissist what comes to mind?

Do you think of the life of the party bragging about their accomplishments to anyone who will listen? Or someone out there seducing people with their considerable charms only to torture them once they are caught in their narc web?

In this episode, you’ll learn the top 10 signs to help you spot a covert narcissist, because this personality type can be even trickier and more insidious than the overt narc. 

This kind of narcissist might be flying under the radar because they can come off as shy or even awkward unlike what we typically might think characterizes these personality types. Raising your awareness is the first step to proactively protecting yourself!


Highlights:

  • 02:25 A review of the qualities of an overt narcissist
  • 03:50 The top ten signs that someone may be a covert or vulnerable narcissist 
    • 03:55 They will appear shy and socially withdrawn
    • 04:15 They will be highly sensitive to perceived criticism
    • 05:25 They are jealous when you have good experiences or advantages
    • 06:15 They have grandiose fantasies, though they may not often voice them
    • 06:40 They display extreme passive aggression and subtle arrogance
    • 09:15 They are incapable of true empathy
    • 11:10 They have the tendency to hold grudges
    • 12:20 They are attached to a victim complex
    • 13:22 They express constant, overwhelming negativity
    • 14:55 They experience anxiety and depression that leads them to wish ill on other, more successful people

Links Mentioned:

Find the downloadable guide I made to go along with today’s episode here.

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  1. Hello Terri,
    So I’m taking into consideration that everyone has some form of narcissism in a way. I am listening to differentiate these two types. There’s a lot out there on social media some I applied some to myself and some I can not because It doesn’t really resonate with me. But i have to say that most of your videos I’ve be learning a lot from. And I understand. BTW…I didnt realize that I held grudges until later on in my years of bringing some negative things back up from past friendships or relationships depending on the timings. And when I came to realized that I was still obviously not letting some things go, I really thought it was because I should’ve stopped engaging with the same people, especially when after years, You know the friendship always seems one sided. Clearly I didn’t trust them anymore. I should have been strong mentality to walk away from certain people, The adult thing to do. And also I was pretty naïve, I’m embarrassed to say that but, I used to think after years of knowing each other friendships and relationships wouldn’t seem so one-sided. And that also brings up negative memories of the past because then it leaves me feeling stupid. I started distancing myself slowly later on down the line, due to the way they would either talk to me or show certain characteristics towards me, and the older I get the more I noticed more. But I always seem to feel bad, I would think I cared more than they do or I care too much and finding out later that most people wouldn’t even care.
    I’m shy in a way but when I come out of my shell I get comfortable. I can see myself attaching stories to myself because I feel like understand it with some things when It triggers a memory, then I remember… It’s really not intentional. but I can definitely see how that can come off childish. By trying to be relatable. Anyway some things you were saying made me feel like I am a vulnerable narcissist which I never thought about. Definitely making me more mindful and self reflecting a whole lot more. I don’t like confrontation because I felt like I’ve had enough. I definitely like to project good because I feel like if I plug it into the world good will come back, and I don’t like confrontations because I’ve had enough of it growing up and I don’t like to blow up. So yeah this is really interesting thanks for Sharing. currently I’m looking to find a good therapist, at the moment I haven’t made a choice on one yet, just the timing, but in the meantime I’ve been catching up on your videos when I can and I appreciate your help. I’ll be purchasing foundry book on Amazon I hope that is OK. Unless the website is a better way of purchase.
    Hoping my long comment isn’t too much, 🙏🏾

    B.Cudjoe

    1. Hi B.Cudjoe – Good for you for doing the work! No matter where you buy the book you can go to boundarybossbook.com to get the bonuses I am still offering 😉

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