A couple weeks ago, we talked about manifesting. A word often overused; a concept often misunderstood; and a whole lot of people confused about how to do it.
The power of conjuring the feelings of having what you seek while visualizing is remarkable and an important part of the manifesting process. The language you use, or what you affirm, mindfully or habitually is another.
The topic of using affirmations to manifest a particular outcome is covered extensively in the self-help world, and, yet, I get emails weekly asking me to explain how to effectively write and use affirmations.
So let’s break down the why and “how to” of affirmations so they can become useful tools.
An affirmation is a personal statement that can be used to boost self-esteem, reduce stress, and manifest the life of your dreams by retraining your subconscious mind. Affirmations can also be the habitual negative stories or statements you have about yourself that get in the way of your dreams coming to fruition. By mindfully using positive affirmations and eliminating negative affirmations, you can raise the vibration of the energy you send into the universe, which positively impacts the experiences you draw to you. This is not magical thinking. Instead, it is using the mind-blowing power of your intention expressed verbally to create what you want in your life rather than using language to express your fears.
Whatever we put our attention on grows.
Saying affirmations focuses our attention on the positive experiences we are creating and speaking them into existence.
One of the most common ways clients sabotage with language is the tendency to use absolutes, negatives, and harsh words to describe their potential. “I’ve always been fat.” “I’ve always been bad with money.” “I’m doomed by my genetics.”
Start by developing a few positive statements, or mantras, to repeat about yourself, your life, or the world on a regular basis. Be mindful of the fact that Words Have Wings and the power to create. Speak about yourself, your life, and your potential the way you want them to be. Period.
So how do you know if your language is affirming what you want or not?
Let’s go through the affirmation process, starting with a few sentences you can create for yourself.
1. Creating a Well-Formed Belief Statement:
- Write in the first person (use “I”).
- Use present tense.
- Use only positive statements (express what will be true, not what won’t).
e.g. Instead of saying “I am no longer exhausted daily” which affirms the negative, turn it around and say, “I am full of energy!” - Keep it short.
- Make it emotionally meaningful to you. It should “feel” right.
Examples:
I am pain free.
I attract the man (or woman) of my dreams.
I am comfortable with a set schedule and a consistent income.
I am thrilled to be making over $____k a year.
I am happy to be fit and healthy.
It is easy to be calm and relaxed.
The weight just melts off my body.
I have the right and perfect job for me.
I also encourage clients to use more generalized affirmation statements in their everyday lives.
Examples:
Everything flows with ease and grace.
I always have more than enough time.
Only good lies before me.
I am divinely protected and guided.
I am abundant.
All my needs are met with ease.
I am loved.
I am worthy.
I am grateful for all of my blessings.
I am a money magnet. (My personal fave!)
2. How To Use your New Affirmation Statement:
- Repeat the phrases throughout the day.
- Make it a habit and try to say them at the same time every day (e.g. while you are showering, on your commute, while meditating, while working out, while lying in bed). Write it down on paper, the bathroom mirror, across your hand. Type it out. Make it your desktop, phone, or tablet background. Whatever works for you to see it and repeat it often!
- Feel the feelings of these affirmations being factual. Feel what the new, improved you looks and feels like.
- Smile when you say them! Know the positive self-talk brings positive results.
3. When the Old Habits Come Creeping Back:
- When you start to feel yourself thinking negative thoughts during the day, counteract them by repeating your positive affirmation.
- Be mindful of what language you use throughout your day. Saying and feeling the positive affirmations is the first step, but using this positive language in the rest of your life is the next step. Making this change in language will naturally draw the experience you seek into your life.
You can only change yourself as much as you change your thoughts and beliefs and how you talk about yourself. This is why Dr. Frank Lipman and I feel so strongly about a Mind AND Body Cleanse. You have to get to the root of what you are saying and use it in a way that supports the physical changes you are striving for in order to make the changes sustained.
Our first 21-Day Mind/Body Program starts TONIGHT!
You can still sign up HERE!
Share your creative affirmations here. If you’ve been using affirmations and mindful speak, tell us what in your life changed when your language, thoughts, and feelings changed.
Love Love Love
Terri
"Everything flows with ease and grace." Love this affirmation! 🙂 Here's my favorite one, "I am beautiful inside and out, and I deserve it ALL!"
Thank you for sharing Julianna ❤️
Terri, I’ve committed a year to speak therapy though the tardiness of me sessions are self sabbotaging in regards to the first session I missed, 2nd session 30mins late, 3rd session 15mins late, 4th totally missed due to phone crashed on me with all appt reminders & my therapist calls me the day before as a tool for this NOT to happen in which I was totally crushed. I feel the battle of myself doing what I need to succeed & my therapist is so supportive & cheering me on even just making it to my sessions. I feel I need to plan a secret backup plan for myself against meself should the sabboter surface. What the hell is wrong with me? I AM A GOOD PERSON. I WOULD NEVER HARM ANYONE, MY TIME IS THE GREATEST THING I CAN GIVE ANY PERSON & I GIVE IT FREELY…so how is it i seem to not receive it for myself? I think why I can’t make the 1hr session in full is because then i will always have to make it for the full sessions thereafter. Self sabotaging, I know. Truly need a tool to combat this. I will not lose this battle. I WILL NOT LOSE THIS BATTLE, I CANNOT LOSE THIS BATTLE..I’m the only one that can fight me, I’m the only one that will take care of me. It is mine, It is me.
I just wanted to know, if I have a negative thought creep in, I’ve been affirming this statement .( I realise my need to be???) then obviously replacing the negative with this statement. So example is I’m not happy, then affirming it by saying I realise my need to be happy. My question is this the word realise is a positive statement? Please could you help me with this, many thanks
Steve
Steve-
I think it is more about clearing the negative feeling than never having a negative thought or using negative language. My pal Lara has some great exercises that speak to this exact thing. Her website is http://www.thelaratouch.com and I believe the one I am referring to is called the Easiest Stress Relief exercise. Good luck!
Thanks Terri I will check it out. I was just wondering my affirmation, I realise my need to be a loving person, would you say that was an affirmation? I really like the way you have explained things its very good. I will be registering my email on your web site
Steve
Even if one were to just concentrate on eliminating the negative reaffirmations that loop in one’s mind- a few of those examples you’ve posted above- would be a huge step in changing basic day to day behavior. If you think of yourself as a loser- my bets are that you will fulfill those expectations.
Yes Victor there is truth in your comment. Positive affirmations are just one tool to move a person from habitual negative thoughts to more positive thoughts about themselves. There is no magic bullet when it comes to self esteem but I can say for a fact that if a client becomes mindful enough to decrease the amount they say they are a loser out loud and to themselves inevitably their self esteem will elevate. Again if we are dealing with deep rooted feelings of unworthiness than more than a positive affirmation is needed to counter long held negative beliefs. Mental health and feelings of self worth require work and a commitment to the belief that things can get better. It is crucial to understand that all of us hold our own key to it getting better. <3