Welcome to MAMAPALOOZA (AKA Spiritual and Other Mothers)!! WHOOOOO HOOOOOOO!! I am holding a contest to inspire you to share your stories of your own Spiritual or Bio Moms and how their love and support impacted your life. There will be a new blog everyday this week starting tomorrow and I am so lit up about the stories and so grateful for the blog posse’s generosity in sharing them.
Mwaaaah!
My own story will be posted on Saturday and I will be picking the lucky winner of the contest on Mother’s Day, May 8th. So get your gratitude on and get writing! Please leave your story in the comment section below. The winning story will be featured on a future blog!
Let me go on the record saying, like many others, I love my mother. Let me also say, like some, I miss her with all my heart, EVERYDAY.
Her death truly tested my faith. I always thought, I must be so hard for someone to lose a person they love out of the blue, not knowing it was going to happen or being given time to prepare yourself for the lost. I thought I was prepared for my mother’s death. Oh I knew it would hurt, but we had been given a chance to talk about what was to come, cry about it together, and know that one day it would happen, not so out of the blue like, and that one day after that, we would see each other again.
So when the call came that I should head back to New Jersey from St. Louis because things seemed to be taking a turn for the worse, I knew I had to get there fast. Not because I was afraid of not making it there in time to say goodbye, but because I knew she’d hold on, through incredible pain until all three of us told her it was okay to go. I was thankful that her time after that was short and her pain not drawn out, that she had time to see the sparrows in the bird house I suction cupped to her hospital room window, but all the internal preparation I thought my mind and heart had done, NON-EXISTENT at the moment of truth. I was angry at God for taking her away from me, from My Kids, MY FATHER. I was angry at myself for being relieved that she didn’t have to suffer long. Did I wish her away too soon?
Two days after her memorial service I sent my husband and kids back home to continue on with getting ready for the start or high school and middle school and to finish off the summer. I stayed a few days, to help my dad get acclimated to paying bills online, social security and insurance calls, etc. I sat that first afternoon on the front porch and looked up into the sky and said, “Mom, you know, if you just gave me a sign that everything was going to be alright, it would be much easier”. I continued on that afternoon, doing things around my parent’s house, and ended up on the patio, picking tomatoes from my mother’s plants. Out of nowhere a hummingbird flew up into my face and buzzed me. I jumped at first, and then said, “hello”. He buzzed away as fast as he came. I went inside and told my dad what had happened and his response was, “you mother would have loved for that to happen to her”. Which I knew was true, because we used to call each other daily to report what had just been at the bird feeder or who was nesting in the wrong house. It dawned on me, “was that my sign”?
I returned to St. Louis and told my bunco girlies about my hummer friend and that month at bunco they gave me a humming bird feeder. Now I’ve had them before, but never really any luck. I jumped out of bed the next day, made the nectar and hung it. Within an hour, I had hummingbirds perching and feeding. By weeks end, I was holding the feeder in my hand and they would take right from me. A few weeks later while weeding, my husband notice something coming up underneath the feeder. He looked and me and said, “should I pull it”? I looked over and told him to leave it, it looked like it might be getting a bud, let’s see what it turns out to be. A week later, it bloomed into a beautiful sunflower. Now I feed the birds, so it might not be so unusual that a sunflower might grow out of nowhere in my garden, but I’ve never had one grow before AND sunflowers just happen to be the flower I used to send my mother every mother’s day. Another sign? I get it mom, it will be okay eventually. The next year, I bought the same type of feeder only larger for my backyard. Cross my heart, a bunch of sunflowers right up underneath it by mid-summer.
I miss my mother every day, but am thankful to God for all the “little” signs.
My spiritual mother is a friend dear friend of mine, her name is Jean. Jean has restored my faith/spiritual which I had sworn off many years prior to meeting her.
I know Jean from my old Brooklyn neighborhood. Jean has a faith deeper then anyone I have ever know and through the years I have learned so much from her. I recall Jean telling me several years ago that when she was about my age (I was 23 at the time.) she never wanted to get married and didn’t want to have children. I could do nothing but laugh hysterically at this because Jean is the mother of ten, yes I said ten children. She continued to tell me how she fell in love with a wonderful man and knew that he wouldn’t spend the rest of his like with her unless she was married. Her love for him was so much that she married him, and they created a family of 12. They raised their children in the church and played a large part in the church community. She went back to school while pregnent with child number 10 to get her masters in education because she wanted her children to know you could do anything in life no matter what the situation. On September 11, 2001 her life was altered. Her husband left for work, a NYC fireman, and he never returned home.
Have had difficulty with faith prior to 9/11 I questioned it evern more. I asked, “How could a loving god, leave this woman a widower with ten children?” But not Jean! Her faith only grew stronger and she shared her faith and her spiritually, her energy.
In the last 2 years her faith was tested again when she was diagnosed with colon and then liver cancer. Through her faith and her love shes cancer free today.
Jean’s love and faith has restored my spiritually and she continues to do it by just being herself.
We lost our daughter in 2000 I just wanted to share the poem I wrote for her funeral cards. Poem for our Daughter
In Memory of our Daughter Autumn MacKenzie O’Brien 3/20/00. Our precious Little Angel, you were perfect in every way–God shared you with us for a moment -but you are his child today! We will always Love you and we will miss you so—But Jesus …needs you more now–So we must let you go. “PLEASE”— the Lord forever and bless him with our Love! You will always be our Angel sent to us from above. We want you to remember the hopes and dreams we had. You were Mommy’s little princess and a fishing pal for Dad, You were J.J.’s baby sister, And Grandmas’ lil doll! You brought smiles,love and joy-And baskets of sunshine to us all! So Autumn take these memories with you as we let you go.We will always LOVE YOU we just wanted to let you know. Forever with our Love
Mom-Dad & J.J.
Looking forward to this week-long celebration.
Speaking of “the other mother” in your life, we have a product that most grandmothers may appreciate: BRUISE CARE. And it’s free for a limited time: http://freeskinhealth.com/
okay okay 🙂 will still leave my love deposits 🙂
Hi Terri! Well, this isn’t going to be an award winning tribute, but, nonetheless true. Growing up, I never really liked my mom. I may have loved her in some way, but, I never felt the “bond”, so to speak. All my friends and my brother’s friends just loved her. She was full of life, loud, and outgoing. Always the center. My mom was ahead of her time. Before the woman’s movement, My mother was moving! There were no flys on her. She hunted deer, drove tractors, built a house with my dad, and when I was in junior high, she became the first female school bus driver in Troy. And, she could cook! Definitely a very strong, determined woman. But, for the little girl that I was, all I wanted was some recognition and to “feel the love”. I didn’t. There were things I did admire, though. She was a dark haired beauty with perfect white smile and unlike me… she could really sing! I thought she could be a movie star. Think Elizabeth Taylor. And, if she were still around, she’d probably be a Zumba instructor! She was colorful to say the least. Her name was Barb. She and my dad spent hours and hours in our yard doing landscaping and planting flowers. In the house, she was a collector of antiques and everything had a perfect place. Well, quite unexpectedly, we lost my mom to lymphoma several years ago. Ironically, I was the only one with her when she took that last breath. Dad had just stepped out for 5 minutes.
Since her passing, I’ve sorted through my feelings. Realize I have some hurt and resentment still, but have also come to realize her reality. Her upbringing effected her, too. She lost her own mom when she was 13, then raised by a stepmother that was cold and mean. I guess it’s so true you learn what you live because she just didn’t know how to be a loving mom. I know now that she did the best she could and her own insecurities were covered up by her “theatrics”. But, she was solid and strong.
At almost 56, I find myself thinking about the things I do now… that are HER!!! I’m a collector, love singing and dancing and I find peace and joy spending many, many hours in my yard and garden. I often think, “My mother would love this house and love spending time here with me”. See, as years passed and I grew up, I saw the love. I finally figured out she fucking loved me! She was proud of ME! She just didn’t know how to show me that while SHE was still growing up! It just goes to show how difficult life can be and how life experiences mold us, good or bad.
Now, when I think of her, it’s with kinder thoughts and gratitude. She was my strongest impression of a woman, she gave me inner strength, determination and a the ability to stand on my own. Somewhere along the line, I have come to “like” my mom and that is a good thing!!! Sounds simple, but it took a long time to get here!
Robin
might look rigged! you can leave your L*O*V*E deposit but sadly can not win (but we both know you have already won;)
xo
love this would it be cheating if I wrote a mini story on how you are my spiritual momma , friend spiritual mentor?