There are certain obvious traits (like addiction, etc.) that make families dysfunctional, but on today’s show, I’m going to be covering some dysfunctional family dynamics that have become normalized in our society.

It is important to be aware of these other types of dysfunction because they can influence a) how you’re raising children and b) your self-esteem.

In this week’s episode, I’ll be covering various dysfunctional traits and next week I’ll be covering dysfunctional roles in family systems.

Enjoy the show!

You can Subscribe to the Podcast on iTunes/Apple Podcasts, SoundCloud, Stitcher or TuneIn.

And please leave me a Rating and Review!

“When a parent acts like you are an extension of them, it is really easy to NOT understand that you’re NOT.” – Terri Cole

Show Notes:

  • What is dysfunction
  • What is interdependence
  • How secondary trauma works
  • What is abuse
  • How perfectionism can create dysfunction
  • What are boundaries
  • What creates a fear-based home

“Unless they are people who have done a lot of self-help work, so much conflict stems from really not knowing how to communicate and when to communicate.” –  Terri Cole

Links Mentioned:

“Any addiction within a family system creates dysfunction for the rest of the people.” –  Terri Cole

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  1. Wow. This is so incredibly helpful and good to hear. Literally everything you listed I’ve dealt with in my family system and have had to continue to deal with in some form even now in my early 40s. I’ve always felt like I’ve had PTSD and was dealing with major trauma and now I didn’t understand why. It feels almost like the lies I’ve been forced to tell, and act like everything is perfect and okay with every one else in regards to my family, had me completely brainwashed into believing that everything really was okay. Except my insides have always felt contrary to that and I often leave feeling violated and abused after each interaction with my parents, especially my mother. She tried to guilt and shame me into literally living my life for her happiness. But I’ve gotten healthy enough to put up boundaries and know this behavior and treatment isn’t okay. I’m trying hard to keep my boundaries with her but she just escalates and hounds me and bombards me with texts and emails about how I’m destroying our relationship. I’m trying so hard to stick to my healthy boundaries and communicate them lovingly and kindly and it’s always met with Tantrums and anger abs aggression and manipulation. I don’t know what else to do. I just know I can’t continue to accept this treatment and toxic behavior because it’s harmful to my healing and growth. I’m trying to navigate through it all but it’s rough. Thank you for your great work and gifting of educating people.

    1. Hi Andrea,
      I’m so glad this resonated for you! I’m holding space for you with so much compassion as you unpack all of these familial narratives, and set your boundaries.

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