Has your relationship been feeling a little flat or boring recently?
If you’re honest with yourself, are you less satisfied than you’d like to be?
2020 dealt us a year like no other, and for many of us, it meant spending more time with our significant others than ever before. Sheltering in place, working from home, and being together non-stop during a global pandemic hasn’t exactly been a recipe for romance. If it was for you, GO, you! But…
If your relationship could use a reset, I’ve put together some ideas and tips for things you can do to bring the harmony, adventure, and passion back into your relationship (and your life)!
First things first: it’s important to pinpoint what is happening under the surface for you right now because it can be easy to blame your relationship for the way you’re feeling without taking into consideration the entire picture.
Take an inventory of your daily habits.
Go through your current day-to-day routine in your mind and try to dial into when boredom or restlessness creeps in. Then ask yourself, do these experiences of boredom or dissatisfaction relate my partnership, or is it something else?
Inside this week’s downloadable guide, I’ve given you some exploratory questions to help you take a holistic look at all of the areas of your life where your need for stimulation, excitement, or passion are not being met.
So many parts of our lives changed dramatically in 2020 and I encourage you to actually take a moment to think about your life and daily interactions/routines pre-Covid and compare them to your reality now. I think you’ll find there might be more impacting how you’re feeling than just your less-than-thrilling love life. This exercise can help you step outside of blaming and clear the way to re-ignite your relationship!
It’s time to SHAKE things up.
Once you’ve taken your inventory, you will have a better awareness of all the things contributing to your feelings. And yes, your relationship might still be on your list, and that’s ok. The next step is to think through your relationship-specific patterns.
- How are you spending your time together?
- What kind of conversations are you having?
- When it comes to sex is it always the same old, same old?
- What are you cooking, eating and doing together- are you in a rut?
I encourage you to take a closer look at where there are opportunities to change up what you’re doing, especially if you’re doing the things you always do…from Netflix to the bedroom.
When you put energy into discovering new things, both together and on your own, it will infuse fresh energy into your life and into your relationship. Busting out of boredom means being willing to change it up and the rewards are more interesting, more expansive, and more exciting experiences.
One of my favorite things Vic, my hubs, says to me is, “Do you want to take an adventure?” Why, yes. Yes, I do. When he asks me I can’t wait to grab my mask, pull on my boots and hop in the truck. You can still take adventures, even if you need to stay close to home (or in your vehicle!). Get creative and invite your partner into a conversation about what would feel new and exciting for both of you.
Commit to Gratitude
Daily gratitude is fuel for a healthy, lasting, and, yes, passionate relationship. I know gratitude might not seem like the sexiest thing, but I promise you, the goodwill built by expressing your genuine appreciation and thanks to your partner can be a foundation for desire.
Work on shifting into a space in which you are grateful for this person and they are someone you’d like to impress. Remember when you first started dating? The extra-special effort you put into your appearance or into planning a memorable, special experience was in a sense, an expression of gratitude for that person and the time spent together. Why not put the same energy and attention into the relationship now? Every once in a while, it can be invigorating to get gussied up and make special plans like when you first met. You might find gratitude coming your way.
Especially now, if you’ve been cooped up together with emotions and stress running high, the more acts of kindness, loving attention, words of gratitude, and affection you can put into your relationship “bank” the more durable your connection will be and the more comfortable you’ll feel being honest, open and intimate. Therein lies the kindling for the spark you feel like you might be missing at the moment.
I hope you got some fresh ideas to help you break out of monogamy monotony and inspiration to try something new! Ebbs in passion are normal inside long term partnerships, but consciously choosing to think outside of the box, to embrace adventure, and to make gratitude a regular practice, can keep it flowing.
I also want to let you know I’ve got something beautiful and free starting today!
It’s called Raise Your Love Vibe Kickstart!
Each day for the next five days, I’ll send you a little love note and a quick video with tips on how to spot the most common, but rarely recognized blocks to healthy, real love.
You’ll also get a small, powerful daily action step to help you kickstart 2021 into your year of EPIC love! So whether you’re in a relationship or single, this non-challenge is for you, love!
I hope that you have an amazing week and as always take care of you.