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“I never thought I was being controlling in my 20s– I really thought I was being loving. What I didn’t realize at that age was how averse I was to other people’s suffering. Someone else having a messy problem created an unbelievable amount of discomfort in me.” – Terri Cole


Welcome to part two of a two-part series I am doing on high-functioning codependency. 

In part one, I talked about the high price we pay for over-giving, over-doing, and over-functioning. I also share my personal and professional experiences with it. If you missed it, read it here.

In this part, I break down the 6 archetypes of high-functioning codependency and give you tools and strategies you can use to free yourself from it. 

When you raise your awareness of these disordered behaviors, you can change them. You do not have to live in the endless exhaustion of high-functioning codependency.


  • Six high-functioning codependency archetypes
    • 4:30 The director
    • 5:40 The entertainer
    • 7:20 The hyper-helper
    • 8:30 Auto-accommodator 
    • 9:25 The perfectionist
    • 10:27 The fixer-savior
  • 12:10 How HFCs unintentionally take over others’ problems
  • Ways to overcome codependent behavior patterns
    • 17:10 Learn to ask expansive questions instead of auto-advice-giving
    • 18:50 Do a resentment inventory
    • 19:50 Accept, surrender, and say yes to help from others

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